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How to Learn Shibari in 5 Steps: Guide to Japanese BDSM

How to Learn Shibari in 5 Steps: Guide to Japanese BDSM

Beautiful photographs of people tied in ropes always seem so seductive and inviting for many. However, learning the Japanese BDSM skill of shibari can be a challenging endeavor. Here's a short guide for you to discover the art of shibari.

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Step 1: Learn from the professionals

This is not because they’re the know it alls: shibari, like any BDSM practice, can be dangerous if performed incorrectly.

  • Take a look at our carefully curated list of bloggers; many of them have their own workshops;
  • Sign up for classes at shibaristudy.com if you live in a big city. Alternatively, visit shibariacademy.com;
  • You can try to find practitioners on forums if you live in a small town; based on our experience they frequently organize a basic course;
  • Don't miss out on big shibari events like London Fetish Week or Prague Shibari Fest, where you can watch advanced-level work and improve.

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Step 2: Pick up the rope

No, a wire rope you found around house is not appropriate - after all, you will be tying a live person rather than a chair. A good rope is made of natural fibers such as jute or hemp. To make it even better, buy it from a shibari shop - they can also teach you how to use it. Try, for example, Twisted Monk.

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Step 3: Find a model

We believe that every other person should try it at least once, but it's often a one-time interest. If you find someone interested, here are some basic requirements for both of you:

  • Complete trust;
  • Emotional connection;
  • A sense of security;
  • Patience;
  • Free time for your sessions.

Try to look for partners through ads in appropriate communities, as enthusiastic friends tend to disappear by the second session. Look outside of your circle!

Step 4: Psychological Safety

Shibari is more than just binding; it is a psychological and emotional practice, almost a meditation. As with any BDSM practice, careful preparation is a must. Here's what counts:

  • Before the session begins, talk with your partner to discuss permissible action;
  • Practice sharing goals and expectations. Shibari is a shared experience; 
  • Have a safe word, even if you trust each other completely;
  • Do not practice tying after a stressful experience; it’s better not to be anxious during the process.

Appropriate guides, such as this one, will teach you everything you need to know about psychological preparation.

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Step 5: do some physical training

A few hours of hanging, as well as hours of practicing tying, is a significant amount of work. Therefore, health and body condition is crucial for the model, but also for the nawashi - the master.

  • Shibari should not be practiced if you have chronic conditions, psychological stress, or a low pain tolerance;
  • A person must be physically fit: not severely overweight or underweight, with no muscle atrophy;
  • Muscles should ideally be athletic.

To make your BDSM practice easier and more fun, go to the gym or enroll in a fitness video course.

Katya Shaposhnikova

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